Baleful Bailer’s Tail Ends In Jail

A classic tale. Man posts $5000 bond as bail for second man. Second man doesn’t pay back quickly enough. First man beats second man with claw hammer. First man goes to jail on $350,000 bond. Inexplicably, somewhere in the middle, three shots are fired by a third man. The first man, Lanell “Mook” Weeks has…

Rep. Steve King: “I’d be open to discussion about [incest]”

Rep. Steve King, an Iowa Republican believes that calls for Rep. Todd Akin to withdraw from the Missouri Senate race are “petty, personal attacks substituting for strong policy.” Akin, he says, is “a strong Christian man, with a wonderful family”. No doubt, these qualifications make Akin a “legitimate candidate”.  Akin, of course, recently came under…

DC Man Orders TV, Gets Assault Rifle Instead

We don’t know if Seth Horvitz enjoys action movies, but his recent attempt to purchase a new television online left him with more action than he bargained for.  Horvitz opened the package he received, and was shocked to discover  not his flat panel television, but an assault rifle. Horvitz called police who took the weapon,…

Women Too Delicate For Manly German Waterslide

Men can reach speeds of up to 72 kilometers per hour on the X-treme Faser water slide at Galaxy Rutschenparadies, which is part of the Therme Erding sauna complex near Munich. Women can watch from the ground and take pictures. Park officials say they moved to ban women from the ride after “six women had…

Swimming In A Sea Of Pee

With the Olympics in full swing, The Huffington Post, bastion of fine investigative journalism, answers today’s most burning question: “Do Olympic Swimmers Pee In The Pool?” The answer, apparently, is a resounding yes, though not in the middle of races. Some even pee on the pool deck. No wonder Michael Phelps is retiring. We look…

It’s A Bird! It’s A Plane! Ouch, It’s A Bird!

Six Flags Great Adventure is one of the world’s best amusement parks, and its Kingda Ka roller coaster is one of the world’s best, with a height of 45 stories and top speeds of 128 miles per hour. When you’re zooming around at that speed you expect thrills, but not a bird in the face.…